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ENTERTAINMENT

A mouthful of Bull

Bored New Zealanders who have tired of the old egg-and-spoon races on sports days have come up with a new variant on that old theme. The contestants have to run 50 metres whilst holding a raw bull’s testicle in their mouths! A red rag may enrage a bull, but it doesn’t begin to compare with the disrespect shown to it’s cojones!
 
IN OTHER NEWS:
 

Isn’t love the Pitts?

Brad is said to be furious over remarks about Angelina allegedly made by his ex, Jennifer Aniston. It might not be a bad idea to step back a minute and reflect on how crushingly he humiliated her when he left her high and dry a few years back. It may serve him well when the Black Widow moves on from him soon!

 

Get it off down under

An Aussie resort plans to hold a month-long nude ‘anything goes ‘ party to try and offset the effects of the global downturn. The owner, Tony Fox ( funnily enough, so do we) said that tough times call for stiff measures.. but we were wondering who will wind up doing the measuring and whether Tony himself measures up?
 
 
MUSIC REVIEW

 

Album:Rock Till You Drop Vol III – Various.

Of course, having “rocked till we dropped” the first time, and perhaps even a second – I suspect we wouldn’t fall for it a third time, but assuming we are as stupid as lemmings having a bad day, I don’t think this thinly disguised way of selling many crap songs off amongst one or two real hits will do very well. With true rock fans, that is. Soft-bellied, striving yuppies however, will probably lap it, believing it will instantly gain them cred. Enough to make the Virgin Mary use the c-word, honestly.

 
MOVIE REVIEW
 

Movie:The Band Visit

 

I will never understand critics who do not understand that the primary function of cinema is to entertain. They frequently fraudulently entice the viewing public to pay good money to see the slowest-moving film, almost as if they are seeking revenge for having had to suffer through it themselves. I do not want to bore you with any details about this one. The biggest favour I can do you is to warn you against going to see it. The price of petrol being what it is, you would have a plausible motive for murder!
 
 
 
 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
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